Love Tips: Three Principles for Navigating “Love Tips”

1. I hope you can overcome trauma with tools on this site… 2. You can learn to speak in ways that work… 3. You can be present and true to your feelings from now on..

Three principles for navigating love tips on this site…

  1. Authenticity firstEverything you speak must be true and real in the moment. Speaking to a man, anyone. Practice speaking in your body to express reality of the moment.
  2. Connection, not competition… If you find yourself in a power struggle or drama or a game with a man (or anyone really)… you’re definitely off track…
  3. NO games, NO drama, NO strategies… Authentically relating is the only way to build love and connection with anyone … there is no way of gaming the system. If you feel like you are strategizing, you probably are in drama or a game and are pursuing outcomes in a masculine way… it means you’re off track. Drop your guard immediately… find something authentic to say or do. that grounds you Get away from love tips, take your focus off a man or anyone, and look more into the tools for connecting with you until you are out of the strategizining and gaming state and tips can be tools for actualizing your own authentic self rather than tactics for getting an outcome.

How to Appreciate A Man… It’s Simple

No excessive gratitude, no begging… No grovelling… No initiating… No baking pies for him or his mom… No asking him out on a date… No cooking him dinner… Let a man give to you. And let yourself receive from him… Don’t minimize or reject his gifts. His giving is his way of connecting with your heart. And when you receive, appreciate what is given. Appreciate the gift. NOT the giver. How do I still receive flowers on every date from a man after 6 months… The first time he brought flowers, on our second date (our first date was coffee). I took pictures of them. I carefully arranged them. I posted pictures of them (not pictures of him and I, pictures of flowers) on Facebook. I admired the flowers, how beautiful they were. I cut the stems sideways so they would last. I put  flower food in right away. I oohed and ahhhed at their beauty. I used snapseed to tweak the images with glamour glow to bring out the yellow in the sunflower. And most important… It wasn’t disingenuous.It was authentic. As I allowed myself to start the process of dwelling on the gift, the moment took me over. I truly allowed myself to receive and enjoy flowers. I do this anytime I receive flowers. And flowers keep coming. I have so many vases now and I have flowers in every room. Flower arranging has become a fun part of my life. And… More than flowers… love keeps coming… You don’t appreciate a man by fawning all over him, reading into gifts, assessing based on a gift how he feels about a relationship, or worse yet, giving to him (which steals his masculine thunder). Simply enjoy a gift and gifts keep coming and so does the giver, your man. Try it today. It is simple … Appreciate his gifts, not the giver. And the man himself will feel appreciated. He will feel masculine and successful with you. He will feel like he can make you happy. And, it is authentic. You will truly learn how to enjoy the little things in life. Your neural pathways will change. You will become a good receiver… a woman who is practiced at letting love in… a woman who has no time to fixate and obsess on meaning and analysis because you are too busy feeling loved and enjoying the little things in life. When you focus on a man rather than his gift, he feels trapped. He feels smothered. Even mothered. On the other hand, men feel appreciated as they know they can make you happy with the things they try to do for you. It is not so much that they need to know that you love them or that you want them or that you want to be with them forever. When they know they can give to you and you can receive graciously from them, that is what rocks a man’s world and conveniently, it is also what builds a connection and ultimately rocks yours. Today…try noticing 1-2 things your man does for you. They can be small. Appreciate 1-2 little things aloud and more will come. More importantly than gifts coming your way is the fact that more intimacy, more attention, and more love come with it. Men are wired to give to a woman. We are wired to receive. Your man feels like a man if you let him give to you. Give yourself the gift of letting love in and give him the gift of being able to love you. Don’t push him away by giving back to him today. Don’t fall at his feet either. Simply appreciate the gift. The gift may be a compliment on your beauty (appreciation = “oh you’re so sweet. That feels nice to hear”), a call to say hello (appreciation = “oh it feels so nice to hear your voice”), a surprise date (“oh what a nice surprise”), a home depot visit to hang that shingle for you (“oh wow, my house looks so nice now…”) Or a rub on the arm, a head tilt, a smile, a kiss on the cheek… All nice little ways to appreciate him. It doesn’t matter what the gift is. Whatever it is, notice it… appreciate it and more will come. More gifts, more love, more femininity in you… More masculinity in him… more connection. Try it today. start a new post.